It’s hard to believe it’s been 11 weeks since I started this journey. It’s been at times, exciting, exhausting, encouraging, discouraging, challenging, freeing, enlightening, and sometimes perplexing.
Today’s update will be short as my time this week has been mostly focused on taking care of my wife after her third and hopefully last surgery on her left foot. She’s in a fair amount of pain so you can pray for her as you think of it.
So just some updates for those of you who are following along:
1) As a family we’re probably nearing the end of our church exploration. Last week on our way to Desert Springs (where we have a lot of friends attending), my daughter said to me, “I’m so over this looking for a church thing.” She didn’t mean she is ready to give up on church, just that the search is growing thin. What’s interesting though, as I alluded to in my last pilgrimage blog, is that we are not finding ourselves faced with no options, but too many. Our hard choice is going to be having to say no to a church we’ve enjoyed. There are probably three or four churches at this point which all seem completely capable of being a place we can minister and be ministered to. Biggest takeaway: My suspicion that our city has plenty of faithful pastors who want to equip saints to be more than pew sitters and preach a clear unobscured Gospel has been confirmed by my visits. I think I half feared I would discover that there is this incredible dearth of scriptural teachers and loving saints that I so often heard complaints about. I’m glad to see my fears were unfounded and my perception verified.
2) The Colorado road on the journey appears to be a dead end. It’s still possible, but unlikely that our journey leads us there.
3) I’ve been working this week to try to book a years worth of conferences and see if it can be done. I am encouraged but not actually surprised by the number of significant contacts and relationships I have developed with pastors over the last two decades. I’ve contacted over 50 churches so far and I think I’m just getting started. Some are long shots for sure, a few are sure things, and most are reasonably good possibilities. Some are local, most are across the country and one is international. My timing is reasonably good as many churches are planning right now for 2014, although if God allows it would be nice to book some conferences to close out this year as well. The prospect of this being where God wants to go is encouraging and leaves me hopeful.
4) And yet, I’m anxious. I know that good marketers are not supposed to indicate any doubt or fear. I was often told the same when I was a pastor. I learned from my mentor Don Schlichte that it’s far better to be genuine even when it involves struggle. Then, when you are genuinely faithful people will see the faith and not applaud you, but God. Recently in our Monday night chronological study we have been going through 2 Corinthians and Paul reminded us that we have an incredible treasure housed in jars of clay so that people can see how incredible our God is! Anyway, I’ve never been hugely bothered by anxiety, but I do so much not want to fail and I have grown weary of living on the edge financially. I’ve grown tired of being the one with “potential.” Potential unrealized after time becomes only failure. Don’t misunderstand me. I’m confident about the content of the conference; I truly believe it’s beneficial and equipping to people who come. I believe it’s unique and it’s my conviction that people are blessed by it that most of all leads me to want to expand the reach of the conference. But Lifesong also was beneficial and building and people didn’t come. Nothing truly profound is being said here, just a part of the journey. God is good, faithful; I’m encouraged about the conference and I’m anxious.
5) If you pray, pray for bookings and for my wife. No doubt part of my anxiety this week is because it’s hard to see my wife in pain, and because it’s times like these that the consequences of a life with disregard for the importance of money shows itself. Still God is good, friends are abundant, my family is awesome and while i’m learning the importance of prioritizing a little thing called money, wealth is still not only measured in dollars.
Well I’ve begun to ramble and that means it’s time to close.
Thanks for following me on the journey. I’ll see you all again soon. (And don’t forget the Stolen Man tomorrow!)
Smiling at the future,
David (Pastormac) Megill